Dear wife,

Or ex-wife, I suppose. They say there are many fish in the sea. And there are, but the only woman I want to reel in is you. You were greedy, yes, but it was only the lure of fishy magic that left you restless. I am sorry that I could not provide what you wanted. Please return to me. Our shack feels like a castle when you’re in it with me.

What are the odds of there being two magic fish in the sea? I don’t know. But for you, my love, I’ll fish until I find out.

Love,

Your humble fisherman